How many Horses does it take to change a lightbulb?

2007
11.18

Thoroughbred: I changed it an hour ago. C’mon you
guys – catch up!
* Arabian: Who ME?? Do WHAT? I’m scared of light
bulbs! I’m outta here!
* Quarter Horse: Put all the bulbs in a pen and
tell me which one you want.
* Standardbred: Oh for Pete’s Sake, give me the
darn bulb and let’s be done with it.
* Shetland: Give it to me. I’ll kill it and we
won’t have to worry about it anymore.
* Friesian: I would, but I can’t see where I’m
going from behind all this mane.
* Belgian: Put the Shetland on my back, maybe he can
reach it then.
* Warmblood: Is the 2nd Level Instruction Packet in English?
Doesn’t anyone realize that I was sold for
$75K as a yearling, but only because my hocks are
bad, otherwise I would be worth $100K? I am NOT
changing light bulbs. Make the TB get back here and do it.
* Morgan: Me! Me! Me! Pleeease let me! I wanna do
it! I’m gonna do it! I know how, really I do! Just watch! I’ll rewire the
barn after, too.
* Appaloosa: Ya’ll are a bunch of losers. We don’t
need to change the light bulb; I ain’t scared of the dark. And someone make
that darn Morgan stop jumping up and down before I double barrel him.
* Haflinger: That thing I ate was a light bulb?
* Mustang: Light bulb? Let’s go on a trail ride,
instead. And camp. Out in the open like REAL horses.
* Lipizzaner: Hah, amateurs. I will change the light
bulb. Not only that, but I will do it while standing on my hind legs and
balancing it on my nose, after which I will perform seven flying lead changes
in a row and a capriole. Can you do that? Huh? Huh? Didn’t think so.
* Miniature: I bet you think I can’t do it just
cause I’m small. You know what that is? It’s sizeism!
* Akhal Te ke: I will only change it if it’s my
owner’s light bulb and no one else has ever touched it.
* Andalusian: I will delegate the changing of the
light bulb to my personal
groom after he finishes shampooing my mane and
cleaning my saddle, but only
on the condition that it is changed for a soft blue
or pink bulb, which
reflects better off my coat while I exhibit my
astonishing gaits.
* Cleveland Bay: I’m busy. Make the whipper-in and
the hounds do it.
* Saddlebred: My ears are up already, please, please
get the &#/~..# light bulb away from me! I’m ready to show, really, I
promise I’ll win!
* Paint: Put all the light bulbs in a pen, tell me
which one you want, and my owner will bet you twenty bucks I can get it
before the quarter horse.
* POA: I’m not changing it. I’m the one who kicked
the old one and broke it in the first place, remember?
Now, excuse me, I have a grain room to break into.
* Grade Horse: Guys? Um, guys? I hope you don’t
mind, but I went ahead and
changed it while you were all arguing.

From an email sent by Susan Drake
Posted by Diana Wold

Your Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.